One in five Americans will serve as an unpaid caregiver, or care partner, for a loved one this year. What's more, many, like me, will do so for multiple loved ones over time. Therefore this message, and these flowers, are for you. To break my silence of four years, I return to this blog with a grateful heart. Let's consider the impact on our country: 53 million Americans will engage their hearts and backs to provide uncompensated healthcare this year. A report published in 2017 by AARP set … [Read more...]
The Not-So-Big Beach House
I wrote the blog, "It's Just a House! Do something with it!!" when Paul and I were getting ready for the first tenant in our not-so-big beach house that had been in my family for forty years. I was freaking out, quietly, in my way. Emotionally, I was pushed to the edge with the intention of making the house perfect, having happy tenants, and ensuring that nothing went wrong. And nothing did go wrong, at least nothing to do with the beach house or the tenants. But six days before our first … [Read more...]
“It’s just a house! Do something with it!!”
Last year, Paul and I bought the family beach house and these words from my mother's painting class keep me going. She charged her painting students with this and other pithy sayings when they were blocked. Today, the words seem prophetic. On the 15th anniversary of my mother’s death, my dear husband and I became sole owners of the Cape May house she adored. It’s a house that has served generations of our family and friends as a respite, a place of celebration, a center for art … [Read more...]
First Father’s Day Without My Father
My father got things done. He applauded us when we got things done. So last week, when I arrived in Cape May, I vowed to restore two wicker chairs my father had cared for years ago. I thought it would be quick work, as the paint was peeling. I’d just shake them off, maybe use a wire brush, then coat them with the oil-based Cover Stain primer our friend Marc Shenfield (a certified wicker nut) recommended. Marc likes to get things done, and he had lovingly restored the rocker in the painting … [Read more...]
Does Generosity Cost You?
If generosity is a good trait, why does it get tangled up in angst and confusion at this time of year? How can you maintain inner peace in a season of relentless advertising, competitive shopping and expensive gift-giving? I have been mulling over this question since we focused on the week six theme of generosity with my Mother-Daughter Way ONE goddesses last month. It was easier to manage week 6 during the pilot group last January when I tagged the focus as a week of … [Read more...]
Open Heart, Open Hand: My Prayer for You
Although I strive for an open heart, I've been quiet lately. Let's be open with each other. There are reasons for my silence. Yes, I lost my father recently. And yes, I am in the midst of running Mother-Daughter Way ONE, which is fabulous and bountiful and exciting. But my quietness puzzles me: I love to write. I write daily, so why have I been reluctant to post? Perhaps I've muted myself because the airwaves were overcrowded with incredibly loud and angry, even hateful speech. The … [Read more...]
Saying Farewell to My Father
My father died last week. Yesterday afternoon I had that familiar impulse to call him, followed by the recognition he would not answer. I had seen him twice during the week before his death, and both times I peppered him with questions. At the end of the first visit, my dear husband and I helped my father into bed, and then Paul left us alone. I kneeled to look into my father's eyes and said, "I just want to make sure you're OK, Dad." He gave me a strong, searching look, and … [Read more...]
